Folks in India
Its certainly true that I have had trouble and frustrations in dealing with folks here. However there is something about this place - it takes the aggression out of you. Partly because people are really nice, partly because people don't really indulge in precise communication and partly because it gets little results. Bangaloreans are really laid back. I am convinced that on the scale of laidback-ness, Bangalore is at the top (or bottom - depending on your point of view). In my building people have been smiling and asking if they can help. I knocked on my neighbour's door yesterday to ask something and ended up staying for dinner. In my 5 weeks in Bangalore I have been invited to homes (of folks I hardly know) about 10 times for meals. Even my maid brought me a home cooked meal one evening. This would not happen in too many other countries.
I had to fire my house help unfortunately, after one week - too unreliable. I found that my life was becoming about waiting for her to show up while she waltzed in and out at her convenience. I tried several times to execute this action but my guts would fail me as she is sooo pleasant and ALWAYS agrees to do what I asked her to do (no delivery guaranteed). And she has a daughter on whom she spends 20% of her family income to send to an English medium school. So I gently explained to her that I had to ask her to stop coming as our timings were not working out. This is how it went:
Me: "Sudha - I think this job is not convenient for you" (By the way she speaks English quite well)
Sudha: "Why you say Madame? I am coming only when you want me to Madame"
Me: "But Sudha you don't show up when you say you will. I waited for you this morning and yesterday evening"
Sudha: "you want me coming tomorrow morning? i coming tomorrow morning"
Me: But you did not show up about 5 times so far when you were supposed to"
Sudha: " One day madam I am very sick only - I go doctor - he give big injection"
Me: " Are you OK now"
Sudha: "yes madam I am fine now. I coming tomorrow morning?"
Me: "Let's take a break and if i want you in two weeks or so I will call you"
Sudha: "No madam its Ok - I coming tomorrow only."
Me: "Here, this is what I owe you for the week"
Sudha: " its OK madam - you pay me later only"
Me: " No Sudha I want you to stop working here for some time. We can talk again after a couple of weeks"
Sudha:"Ok Madame"
her one last attempt as she leaves " I coming tomorrow morning madam?"
Me : "NOOOO NOT TOMORROW".
Someone keeps tabs. Over the next 2 days I had 5 or 6 women knock on my door and ask to work. So I start on my second maid tomorrow. This process seems to be more about training me in the ways of things here than in getting myself set up the way I want to. I am still hoping for an efficient set up - or else I may have to give up my job as most women in India do and just take care of house. I would be one starving housewife.
For those of you outside India - you are probably wondering - what's the big deal - why cant you clean house yourself? The house has to be cleaned almost everyday - there is too much dust - once a week will not do and if the floors are not mopped everyday they become streaky by the second day. But actually I agree - its no big deal. I can easily clean house myself and I plan to.
I had to fire my house help unfortunately, after one week - too unreliable. I found that my life was becoming about waiting for her to show up while she waltzed in and out at her convenience. I tried several times to execute this action but my guts would fail me as she is sooo pleasant and ALWAYS agrees to do what I asked her to do (no delivery guaranteed). And she has a daughter on whom she spends 20% of her family income to send to an English medium school. So I gently explained to her that I had to ask her to stop coming as our timings were not working out. This is how it went:
Me: "Sudha - I think this job is not convenient for you" (By the way she speaks English quite well)
Sudha: "Why you say Madame? I am coming only when you want me to Madame"
Me: "But Sudha you don't show up when you say you will. I waited for you this morning and yesterday evening"
Sudha: "you want me coming tomorrow morning? i coming tomorrow morning"
Me: But you did not show up about 5 times so far when you were supposed to"
Sudha: " One day madam I am very sick only - I go doctor - he give big injection"
Me: " Are you OK now"
Sudha: "yes madam I am fine now. I coming tomorrow morning?"
Me: "Let's take a break and if i want you in two weeks or so I will call you"
Sudha: "No madam its Ok - I coming tomorrow only."
Me: "Here, this is what I owe you for the week"
Sudha: " its OK madam - you pay me later only"
Me: " No Sudha I want you to stop working here for some time. We can talk again after a couple of weeks"
Sudha:"Ok Madame"
her one last attempt as she leaves " I coming tomorrow morning madam?"
Me : "NOOOO NOT TOMORROW".
Someone keeps tabs. Over the next 2 days I had 5 or 6 women knock on my door and ask to work. So I start on my second maid tomorrow. This process seems to be more about training me in the ways of things here than in getting myself set up the way I want to. I am still hoping for an efficient set up - or else I may have to give up my job as most women in India do and just take care of house. I would be one starving housewife.
For those of you outside India - you are probably wondering - what's the big deal - why cant you clean house yourself? The house has to be cleaned almost everyday - there is too much dust - once a week will not do and if the floors are not mopped everyday they become streaky by the second day. But actually I agree - its no big deal. I can easily clean house myself and I plan to.
posted by Iss Desh ki Dharti at
12:13 AM
2 Comments:
nice piece...especially conversation with the maid..Somehow, I feel I am having it easy in many ways because I am crashing at my parents in Bangalore. I have been insulated from having to deal with the maids, although, I had to run around for broadband and there was as much shenanigun about the telco officer here with 15 phones around his left elbow..well you know.
Laid back is great. :)
One of the motives I have been exploring recently is the idea that there are no interruptions. Everything is a manifestation of the reality of that moment. I guess there is a fine balance between acceptance and productivity :)
Being unemployed right now, I guess, offers a little more freedom to explore.
Thanks for sharing. I love this entry.
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